This is a sharing from Working with I Am Word with Paul Selig group.
From Michael Sandlers “Inspire Nation” show last week. He asked Paul, “How do we shift our country into love”. The Guides response:
Know who you are, know who your neighbor is, don’t despise who you don’t know. Don’t decide they are a threat.
Act in love and you will know love. Who you exclude from love you make your enemy, you build your wall against.
To build a wall against another is to exclude them from the light that you say you truly are. There can be no walls. You stand in the light to shine upon all you see not just the things you would prefer, or have in your view. You must claim the truth in all things, not just the things that are easy for you or would give you what you want…”
This morning this message popped up in my newsfeed. I feel it is like a conclusion for the lesson I’ve been shown to learn recently. It affirmed what I have to take in at this point of my life.
A few weeks ago, a spiritual teacher that I respect dearly acted out in the public forum by using foul language and hateful attitude. I was seriously shocked because of the way he dealed with the situation. I could understand there was cultural difference and language barrier that caused the issue. I personally wrote a private message to point out what the problem might be. He kindly responded and we had a short peaceful discussion on the issue and gently agreed and disagreed on the points of my views. He is still going to be whoever is set out to be.
However, this incident was like a big rock dropped in the middle of my heart. Thoughts, emotions and reactions are like the ripples, or maybe at one point big waves. The part in me that could not settle was that I had to accept he is not who i think he was and also what’s up with all the foul language and hateful attitude? I felt there is a part of me did not want this to happen. There is this part of him i could not stand and accept.
I felt the need to follow the current “battle” news from his pages and the comments from the particular forum he acted out at. Mostly, I felt the need to gossip about him, to laugh at his reactions and emotions, and even to screenshot all conversations to show my friends how ridiculous it is.
I started to find myself analyzing his behaviors with the spiritual teachings and to find faults in whatever he said or did. I had to justify what I set out to learn was “right” and he is lost and couldn’t see it.
To be honest, during the whole process I did not feel great emotionally and spiritually even though i found the temporary relief after bashing him. I felt justified for a glimpse of time . But i still don’t feel great deep down in my heart. I felt my heart was closed AF.
This voice behind my back kept saying “stop following the battle ground, ” “refrain from talking about this teacher” and “there is a lesson in all of this for you to learn.” I couldn’t stop right away but i periodically said to my friends that i should just stop following this.
One day, after i screenshoted the lastest battle news about a junk post of ballet dancer, i felt emotionally aweful and disturbed. My helping spirits gave me a serious talk on this topic.
They affectionately told me the following:
“Everyone on this earth is going through their own journey. Our physical body goes from infant, toddler, child, teen, adult to senior and this also applies to our spiritual body.
You do not see their point on a ballet dancer holding the teachings but it doesn’t mean others can’t find the beauty and the association of their spiritual growth. It is a part of their journey. We are not saying senior is superior to infant. It is all a part of the growth and spiritual development. Everyone has to find their own way.
At one point of the spiritual development, your ego needs to have an outside manifestation, like a teacher , a guru or an instructor to show you the spiritual path is right here and it is possible to achieve. This teacher you follow represents the wisdom, the selflessness and all ideal qualities your soul projects out. You need to see that in your eyes–the physical manifestation.
It does not mean this teacher you follow does not have his own ego or struggles anymore. The quality you see in him is the quality you have already had inside.
As a spiritual teacher, the more followers project the ideal qualities in them to you, you, of course get to strengthen your belief in your awesome qualities. This does not solely come from your personal power. A lot of spiritual teachers get lost in this immense power they get from his/her individual and the followers’ collective belief in him/her.
This is all mutual.
We are all here to help each other to strengthen each other’s soul.
At the same time, the bad qualities you are seeing in your teacher are those you are afraid to face. Your resistance comes from you being unable to face that part of you. So think about what triggered you the most from his behaviours and attitude and which part of it resonates with the you that you want to push away eagerly. ”
I reflected on this and see the ego I fear and am trying to fight with in me. I see that girl who are crying for acceptance. I see the part of me that is hesitant to express what i truly feel because I labelled them negative and it is not allowed to show it publically.
I was so keen in following the “battle news” because I have a serious battle in me.
It all comes down to I was seperated with my light, my inner source and it is always easier to build a wall instead of breaking down the war. It is easy to justify myself instead of coming from a more understanding place that he is not my enemy…he is just showing me a part of me.
I hence bow down to the teachings behind this battle and give gratitude to the conflicts, foul languages and hateful attitude, like what Paul Selig’s guides said in the end of the quote above: “You must claim the truth in all things, not just the things that are easy for you or would give you what you want…”
The teachings are beyond individual. It is a collective learning experience because we all play a role to mirror one another’s inner state.