“Like a caring mother holding and guarding the life of her only child, so with a boundless heart of loving kindness, hold yourself and all beings as your beloved children.” ~ Buddha
The teaching of Buddha is full of self-love, self-acceptance, self-compassion and self-care. In Buddhism, there is no such concept as good and evil. People do bad things or harm others because they are ignorant or unconscious of what is going on in them.
To accept the basic goodness in people is not easy, especially when we look at criminals, war crimes, rapists, child abusers…etc. People might say how we can use the excuse that these “bad” people are just ignorant.
Trungpa Rinpoche said that to be a spiritual warrior means that we refuse to give up on anyone or anything. He said this is the essence of human bravery.
When I look at Bert Hellinger’s work of Family Constellation, he advocates we need to acknowledge what is. In the work of family constellation or Shamanic healing, I have seen some difficult situations that cause the clients misery. It can be war, death in the family, accidents, exploitations…etc. The sufferings are tremendous and devastating.
If we could not accept what is and hold the expectations on how people and things should be, we can’t move forward with life and live our life fully.
Romaine Rolland said: ” There is only one heroism in the world: to see the world as it is, and to love it.”
On our soul level, the only reason our fates bind with each other is out of love. Even it is the relationship between perpetrators and victims, the living and the dead. We are all connected to one another as one.
Buddha’s teaching reflects this.
The place to start is within ourselves. We all have the parts we love and hate about ourselves. Hold ourselves, especially the unwanted part of us, as our beloved child. Nurture it. Ask it what it is that we wanted the most and didn’t get from the outside. And then connect to the loving and kind source of the universe, whether you call it god(s), Buddha, helping spirits, power animals, spiritual guides, guardian angels…etc. Ask its wisdom, love and care coming in to our sore spots in our heart.
As Tara Brach mentioned in her book Radical Acceptance “When we embrace ourselves and others with Radical Acceptance, we are seeing past the roles, stories and behaviours that obscure our true nature. “
Being ultra friendly with ourselves is the key and the cornerstone on the path of our healing..